How to build a Pirate Ship

  1. Get meat;
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  2. Cook bacon (of course);
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  3. Grab pirate ship pan.  You do have one, don’t you?
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  4. Install italian sausage portholes;
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  5. Install lamb sausage decking;
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  6. Create chicken breast sails;
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  7. Add bacon rigging and lamb sausage crowsnest;
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  8. …and lamb sausage mast;
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  9. Fill Jolly Rogers with black pepper;
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  10. Raise the T-bone flags!
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  11. Fill with veal meatloaf for ballast;
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  12. Wait, it’s not full.  Add more T-bone chunks;
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  13. Use the rest of the italian sausage to fill ‘er up;
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  14. Then add bacon.  ‘Cause that’s what you do.
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  15. Throw it in the hold and bake it until it’s good and solid, then flip it over onto a cookie sheet or something;
    IMG00059-20081025-2017
  16. Bake it some more until it gets nice and toasty on top.  You may want to add butter to the sails to make sure they stay moist.
    IMG00061-20081025-2059

That’s it.  There should be enough pirate ship for your whole crew of scalawags to plunder.  Add rye or beer to make it a rowdy free-for-all, or class it up with some red wine – it’s up to you ‘cause you’re the captain!

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